LEADERSHIP – IT’S ALL IN THE MINDSET

Leadership – It’s all in the mindset

Steve Siebold in his book, How Rich People Think, says that the “haves” believe that money reveals who people really are, whereas the “have-nots” believe that money changes people from who they were into someone else. The same thing can be said of those who find themselves in positions of leadership. Those who know how to handle it, also knew before they were given it, while those who misunderstood from the beginning simply proved that fact when they got promoted.

Effective leadership is all about adopting the right mindset . Understanding what is expected of a leader (by yourself and others) and valuing those things.  If you value the right things then you are more likely to invest the time to doing the right things!

If you already know how to use the power that you’ve been entrusted with, then the following five leadership mindsets will seem like common sense. But if you are among the majority who are still learning to be an effective leader, or simply looking to raise your game, then study these points carefully. Even you can learn to dance.

It’s better to be a shepherd than a lion tamer.

In most cases, employees need to be nurtured. They need to be encouraged to be all that they can, but within the limits of what they are capable of.

Shepherds do this. They let their sheep wander across the hills to look for the grass that appeals to them the most. But sometimes those sheep get lost. They end up in places where they shouldn’t have gone. That’s when the shepherd comes along and helps them to get back to where they belong. Shepherds, however, don’t use a chair to keep their sheep at an arm’s length; neither do they use a bull-whip to demonstrate who’s in charge. Even when they have a sheepdog to help, they provide gentle support and guidance that helps ensure the sheep are corralled and moving together.

Leadership Mindset #1: Coaching is an important skill of effective leaders.

It’s better to over-appreciate than to under-appreciate.

Many leaders and managers take their subordinates for granted. They assume they’ll always be there, and their opinion is that “no news is good news.” Which means that the only time that they saying anything is when those who work for them, in their opinion, have caused a problem.

The truth is that you need them more than they need you. In fact, your success depends almost entirely on the work they do. As a leader, your job is to finesse, to shape, to direct, and as necessary, to dig in with the troops.

Leadership Mindset #2: Celebrate the success you achieve through and with others more than that achieved through your own efforts.

Knowledge that is hoarded will undermine your success.

Contrary to popular opinion, information is kinetic power. That means that it only has the potential to be powerful. But to unleash it, you must share it. If you don’t, then it makes youpowerless. It prevents you from doing anything through others and let’s face it: You can’t do it all by yourself.

You demonstrate real power when your people can do a great job without you. If you to hold their hands all the time, then you’re doing something wrong.

Leadership Mindset #3: It’s better to share what you know than to keep it to yourself.

It’s easier to keep people motivated than to motivate the demotivated.

Hardly anyone starts a new job demotivated. Usually they’re so excited that they can’t wait to get busy, they arrive at their new company, or new job, on the first day feeling like a rock-star, wanting to be a rock-star. The demotivation comes later, after they’ve been there for a little while. Six months seems to be about the average. There are many possible causes, but the biggest one probably is that they realize that their boss or their organization doesn’t value them anymore; that instead, they’re just a warm body.

Do yourself a favor: Remember that you hired them because of the value that you believed they would contribute. Make sure that that they know that you know that and, while you’re at it, provide them with a supportive environment so they can.

Leadership Mindset #4: You hired rock-stars, help ensure that everyone gets to play to their strengths.

 It’s easier to make a good decision than to try to fix a bad one.

Good decisions come from obtaining salient information; and to get it, you have to listen.

Listening is a lost art. Most people believe that it means to pay attention just long enough to gather their own thoughts so that they can interject their ideas as soon as the other person pauses for breath. And if the lung capacity of the one seems to be more than a few seconds, they interrupt anyway, because they’re convinced that what they know is far more relevant than what anyone else does.

In the words of a wise sage, learn to shut-up. You may be responsible for making the decisions, but you certainly don’t have all the answers.

Leadership Mindset #5: Exceptional leaders W.A.I.T. They ask themselves “Why Am I Talking?”

If  you put these five leadership mindsets into practice, then you’ll be well on your way to exercising the power you’ve been given responsibly, and your staff will reward you by giving you more cooperation than you imagined possible.
http://peopledevelopmentmagazine.com/blog/2014/11/12/leadership-mindset/

How To Develop Persistence by Napoleon Hill

• Motivation

by Carla Schesser - 

Image Credit | ventureburn

‘Think and Grow Rich’ by Napoleon Hill is unarguably one of the greatest personal development books ever written. Highly endorsed by the world’s top leaders such as Bob Proctor and Tony Robbins, if you haven’t read it you’re already behind.

I first read ‘Think and Grow Rich’ about 4 years ago and since then have read it at least once a year and I have the audiobook on repeat in my car.

One of my favorite chapters is on Persistence (Chapter 9) and I have identified the key takeaways for you to enjoy. If you haven’t read ‘Think and Grow Rich‘ yet, this should give you a good taste as to what it’s like and if you have, a reminder never hurts!

How to Develop Persistence:

4 Steps that lead to habit of persistence:

1. A definite purpose backed by a burning desire for its fulfillment.
2. A definite plan, expressed in continuous action.
3. A mind closed tightly against all negative and discouraging influences, including negative suggestions of relatives, friends and acquaintances.
4. A friendly alliance with one or more person who will encourage you to follow through with both plan and purpose.

Definite Causes of Persistence:

1. DEFINITENESS OF PURPOSE. Know what you want is the first and, perhaps, the most important step toward the development of persistence. A strong motive forces you to surmount many difficulties.

2. DESIRE. It is comparatively easy to acquire and maintain persistence in pursuing the object of intense desire.

3. SELF-RELIANCE. Believe in your ability to carry out a plan encourages you to follow the plan through with persistence.

4. DEFINITENESS OF PLANS. Organized plans, even though they may be weak and entirely impractical, encourage persistence.

5. ACCURATE KNOWLEDGE. Knowing that your plans are sound, based upon experience or observation, encourages persistence; “guessing” instead of “knowing” destroys persistence.

6. COOPERATION. Sympathy, understanding and harmonious cooperation with others tend to develop persistence.

7. WILLPOWER. The habit of concentrating your thoughts upon the building of plans for the attainment of a definite purpose leads to persistence.

8. HABIT. Persistence is the direct result of habit. The mind absorbs and becomes part of the daily experiences upon which it feeds. Fear, the worst of all enemies, can be effectively cured by forced repetition of acts of courage. Everyone who has seen active service in war knows this.

 http://addicted2success.com/motivation/how-to-develop-persistence-by-napoleon-hill/

7 Ways to Unmask the Superhero Inside of You

Posted on February 24, 2015 by Leslie Romero Ralph | 

“The beauty of the soul shines out when a man bears with composure one heavy mischance after another, not because he does not feel them, but because he is a man of high and heroic temper.” -Aristotle

We are fascinated with superheroes. These daring characters give us something to aspire to.

Even if not human themselves, superheroes represent the essence of being human. Like you and me, they may be flawed, yet theirs are stories of emerging from struggle, conflict, and trauma with amazing gifts.

A superhero offers hope and comfort as we mere mortals make sense of a complex world, and they inspire by illustrating the potential in all of us to be someone great. You see, heroes also exist outside of comic books and the silver screen. Of course, famous leaders, reformers, and philanthropists can be heroes, but countless other ordinary people make an extraordinary impact on someone’s world.

For all of our admiration, we might actually have one advantage over superheroes. Unlike those masked wonders saving the day, we don’t need a secret identity to be heroic (though many of us might underestimate ourselves or keep our talents hidden).

Everyone, even you, has a superhero inside. Here are seven ways to unmask yours.

Find and work at your passion.

Just as each superhero has a mission, we have special talents and interests that we feel passionate about. If you already know where your passion lies, work at it wholeheartedly. The end goal isn’t as important as the time spent doing something with passion.

Whether you want to dedicate more time to a hobby or make a radical career change, make a realistic plan to get yourself there (then act on it). If you are tempted to avoid action out of fear, uncertainty, or self-doubt, acknowledge this and use it as a reminder of how much you care (then keep moving).

If you haven’t found your passion, commit to exploring this. Think about what you would do for free, where you fit in the most, and what you would do no matter what anyone else thought.

You might also list the things you have always dreamed of doing or remember what you wanted to be as a child. Once you have a few ideas, try one. Treat it like an experiment and approach this with an attitude of curiosity.

Stand for something.

Any superhero knows that you need to believe in something and then stand up for those beliefs. Get to know what you believe and why, then stand behind it fully.

What do you value most? Human rights? The environment? Justice? Peace? Support a cause and take action. Speak up for what you believe, and let your actions match your words. Whatever steps you take, let them be taken with honor and respect.

Do good.

Superheroes make a name for themselves by doing good. Good deeds, no matter how small, go a long way toward helping others (and ourselves).

The first step is believing that you can make a difference. Next, do something good with your words and actions. Share a kind word, lend a helping hand, or donate time and resources to a cause you support.

Write your story.

Every superhero has an origin story. What is yours?

Ask yourself how you came to value what you do. Remind yourself of times that you’ve used pain as fuel for growth. Your story may be one of resilience, bravery, or inspiration.

Dreams, challenges, strengths, and aspirations are all part of your story, and this is a story worth sharing. Use the way you express yourself best to give your story a voice.

Don’t let fear become your nemesis.

For every superhero, there is also a supervillain, and for us, fear can be a pretty formidable opponent. Believe in your potential for greatness, and act with courage. This means moving forward even when you feel afraid.

Acknowledge fear’s presence and even listen to what it has to say, but don’t mistake it for the whole story. Understand where your fear may stem from, and move forward anyway.

Don’t stand in your own way by caving in to doubts, insecurities, and the message from others that you can’t. Take healthy risks to expand your comfort zone, and hang in there through discomfort.

Spend quality time alone. 

To hone your super potential, give yourself quality time alone each day. Establish a personal space that gives you a little solitude. This time can be used for reflection, learning, and practicing your talents.

Begin a contemplative practice, such as journaling, meditation, or prayer. Other activities like dance, yoga, art, music, writing, and martial arts are also great avenues of self-exploration and self-expression.

Above all else, conduct yourself with integrity.

Heroes can be distinguished from villains by their integrity and honor. They are committed to doing what is right.

Do what you think is right, even if it isn’t always what is easiest. Treat others with kindness and compassion. Rise above challenges, oppression, and discouragement, and do so with honesty, dignity, and respect.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/7-ways-unmask-superhero-inside/

5 Things You Can Do To Overcome A Bad Decision

by Theresa Ho | 10 comments

“Stop beating yourself up.  You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.” – Unknown

When I left my corporate job to pursue my passion business, I was so psyched and eager to get it moving.   I was so hungry to have my new website up and running that I was saying “Yes” to everything. I thought this would help accelerate the process of making money doing what I love.

I got caught up with my desperation to see results, thinking I am going to defy what others say: “it takes time to get your business up and running.”

I signed up for everything, as I was determined to absorb all the information I can and put the knowledge to work.  I even signed up and paid a huge lump sum for web and marketing services with someone who I thought would really provide value without doing my due diligence and checking references.  After all, he hung around many people who I respected, so I got lazy and thought to myself I should be fine.

What ended up happening was my gut was right, the web and marketing services I received was not up to par with my expectations.  My heart ached knowing I paid way too much for the amount of time I spent on the follow ups and my expectations of the service provided.  I needed to relieve myself from the sense of disappointment I felt.

The thing is the more I thought about how I needed to be kind to myself and stop beating myself up, the more wound up I got wound up and let it bother me.

I asked my mentor about this and she said, “well what is keeping you stuck?” I said my judgment towards myself, and my business success is being based on one poor decision I made.

Mentor:  Does this belief empower or disempower you?

Me: Disempower

Mentor: What belief can you have instead to help empower you?

Me: I will be successful despite of a bad decision.

As the words came out of me, I was delighted to receive this insight from within.

As the conversation continued, many more nuggets of wisdom surfaced that served as great reminders on how you can shift your mindset and relieve yourself from a decision you regret.

1. Remember your Passion.

This is about restoring your focus on your end goal instead of the problem. When you have your eyes on the end goal, and why is it important for you to achieve what it is you want, your mind will start to seek solutions instead of dwell in the circumstance.   Your tenacity kicks in and this is what keeps you unstuck and drives you forward in getting things done when the going gets tough.

2. See Mistakes as Mis(s)-Takes

I love this concept because it encourages us to experiment and explore. From our mistakes or failures, there’s always a lesson to be learned to help us grow. This is the gem when we are able to accept our “Miss” Take and seek the lesson in the Mistake.  In doing so, we shift our energy resourcefully towards focusing on the next steps in getting back on track, rather than using our energy in an un-resourceful way.

3. Nothing is permanent in life. This too shall pass.

Change is a constant in life. It is a bit surreal and uncanny when you think about it, because moment to moment things can change, which means each moment is a start of something new. When things are going well in your life, you try and savor the moment as long as can, because you know things can change.  On the other hand, when things aren’t going the way you want, you can’t wait for change.  In essence, there is no point to get attached to something, but to appreciate change.  When you do, it puts you in the driver seat in taking charge of your next move.

4. Get a mentor or call a trusted friend.

As human beings, it is our innate nature to want to connect with one another, share our experiences and feel supported in our lives. The key is to surround yourself with people who are positive influences and provides you with objective insights that inspire and challenges you to be at your best. 

5. Forgive yourself.

Accept your own apology. We often focus on the idea of forgiving others, why not forgive ourselves for making a bad decision and restore the love for ourselves?  We not only will feel more at peace and less stressed, but it also positively affects our mental and physical well-being.

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Don’t let a bad decision bring you down.  Reclaim your power and put it to good use, in ways that make you feel good and free.  What do you do to get over a bad decision

http://www.thechangeblog.com/bad-decision/

The 6 Basic Human Needs That Make Us Tick

 

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I’ve seen it a million times–people equate their net worth with their self worth. Their identity is married so deeply to their bank statements and quarterly portfolio reports that they’ve forgotten that money is simply a vehicle for trying to meet our needs, almost all of which are not financial.

We’re all familiar with the cliche that money cannot buy happiness, but I’m convinced that almost everybody has to learn that lesson the hard way because let’s face it; the idea of having enough money to throw at your problems until they’re solved is a seductive impulse.

It certainly was something I constantly thought about as a kid. Growing up, money was always out of reach. It was always a source of stress because there was never enough of it. I remember knocking on the neighbor’s door to ask for food for my brother and sister and me.

Then, on a Thanksgiving Day when I was 11 years old, something happened that changed  my life forever. As usual, there was no food in the house, and my parents were fighting. I heard someone knocking at the front door. I opened it a crack and saw a man standing on the  steps with grocery bags filled with enough food for a big Thanksgiving dinner. I could hardly  believe it.

Fast forward several years to when I was 17. I saved my money from working nights as a janitor and went out on Thanksgiving and fed two families. It was one of the most moving experiences of my life. I’d learned the joy of giving and to this day I consider contribution to be one of the six most important things every person needs.

Whatever emotion you’re after, whatever vehicle you pursue—building a business, getting married, raising a family, traveling the world—whatever you think your nirvana is, there are six basic, universal needs that make us tick and drive all human behavior. Combined, they are the force behind the crazy things (other) people do and the great things we do. We all have the same six needs, but how we value those needs and in what order, determines the direction of our life.

Need 1: Certainty/Comfort

The first human need is the need for Certainty. It’s our need to feel in control and to know what’s coming next so we can feel secure. It’s the need for basic comfort, the need to avoid pain and stress, and also to create pleasure. Our need for certainty is a survival mechanism. It affects how much risk we’re willing to take in life—in our jobs, in our investments, and in our relationships.

The higher the need for certainty, the less risk you’ll be willing to take or emotionally bear. By the way, this is where your real “risk tolerance” comes from.

Need 2: Uncertainty/Variety

Let me ask you a question: Do you like surprises?

If you answered “yes,” you’re kidding yourself! You like the surprises you want. The ones you don’t want, you call problems! But you still need them to put some muscle in your life. You can’t grow muscle—or character—unless you have something to push back against.

Need 3: Significance

We all need to feel important, special, unique, or needed. So how do some of us get significance? You can get it by earning billions of dollars, or collecting academic degrees—distinguishing yourself with a master’s or a PhD. You can build a giant Twitter following. Or you can go on The Bachelor or become the next Real Housewife of Orange County. Some do it by putting tattoos and piercings all over themselves and in places we don’t want to know about.

You can get significance by having more or bigger problems than anybody else. “You think your husband’s a dirt bag, take mine for a day!” Of course, you can also get it by being more spiritual (or pretending to be).

Spending a lot of money can make you feel significant, and so can spending very little. We all know people who constantly brag about their bargains, or who feel special because they heat their homes with cow manure and sunlight. Some very wealthy people gain significance by hiding their wealth. Like the late Sam Walton, the founder of Wal-Mart and for a time the richest man in America, who drove around Bentonville, Arkansas, in his old pickup, demonstrating he didn’t need a Bentley—but of course, he did have his own private fleet of jets standing by.

Significance is also a money maker—that’s where my dear friend Steve Wynn has made his fortune. The man who made Las Vegas what it is today knows people will pay for anything they believe is “the best,” anything that makes them feel special, unique or important, anything that makes them stand out from the crowd. He provides the most exclusive, luxurious experiences imaginable in his casinos and hotels—they are truly magnificent and unmatched in the world.

Need 4: Love & Connection

The fourth basic need is Love and Connection. Love is the oxygen of life; it’s what we all want and need most. When we love completely we feel alive, but when we lose love, the pain is so great that most people settle on connection, the crumbs of love. You can get that sense of connection or love through intimacy, or friendship, or prayer, or walking in nature. If nothing else works, you can get a dog.

These first four needs are what I call the needs of the personality. We all find ways to meet these—whether by working harder, coming up with a big problem, or creating stories to rationalize them. The last two are the needs of the spirit. These are more rare—not everyone meets these. When these needs are met, we truly feel fulfilled.

Need 5: Growth

If you’re not growing, you’re dying. If a relationship is not growing, if a business is not growing, if you’re not growing, it doesn’t matter how much money you have in the bank, how many friends you have, how many people love you—you’re not going to experience real fulfillment. And the reason we grow, I believe, is so we have something of value to give.

Need 6: Contribution

Corny as it may sound, the secret to living is giving. Life’s not about me; it’s about we. Think about it, what’s the first thing you do when you get good or exciting news? You call somebody you love and share it. Sharing enhances everything you experience.

Life is really about creating meaning. And meaning does not come from what you get, it comes from what you give. Ultimately it’s not what you get that will make you happy long term, but rather who you become and what you contribute will.

Now think about how money can fulfill the six human needs. Can money give us certainty? You bet. Variety? Check. Obviously it can make us feel important or significant. But what about connection and love? In the immortal words of the Beatles, money can’t buy you love. But it can buy you that dog! And it can, unfortunately, give you a false sense of connection because it attracts relationships, although not always the most fulfilling kind. How about growth? Money can fuel growth in business and in learning. And the more money you have, the more you can contribute financially.

But here’s what I truly believe: if you value Significance above all else, money will always leave you empty unless it comes from a contribution you’ve made. And if you’re looking for significance from money, it’s a high price to pay. You’re looking for big numbers but it’s unlikely you’ll find big fulfillment.

The ultimate significance in life comes not from something external, but from something internal. It comes from a sense of esteem for ourselves, which is not something we can ever get from someone else. People can tell you you’re beautiful, smart, intelligent, the best, or they can tell you that you are the most horrible human being on earth—but what matters is what you think about yourself. Whether or not you believe that deep inside you are continuing to grow and push yourself, to do and give more than was comfortable or you even thought possible. The wealthiest person on earth is one who appreciates.

http://addicted2success.com/success-advice/the-6-basic-human-needs-that-make-us-tick/

The Power of Beliefs-Tony Robbins

Too busy for self awareness?

When I go on conferences, business talks or parties and meet people, they ask me what my profession is and I tell them that I am an Executive Coach specialized on self awareness and conflict management, they usually answer quite quickly, saying : ” I have no conflicts!”

My reply is :” Oh, that’s great for you! I have my first conflict in the morning, when my alarm clock rings at 6.00 a.m., telling me, it is time to get up.”

It is really time to wake up and get a realistic view that -throughout the day- we all are dealing with a lot of conflict situations. Conflicts come around whether we are working in a money oriented business structure and/ or running a relationship oriented “family business” with our husband or wife, kids, parents, friends…

Yes, success and happiness are our goals. On this way we have to manage a lot of situations which are unsatisfying and difficult.

During our sessions, when there is more time to talk to each other, people usually become increasingly open, talking about self awareness, conflict situations and difficult people they have to deal with.

In my Executive Coachings I focus with my clients on conflict management regarding resilience and finding solutions for a healthy mindset. It is always interesting for me to listen carefully to my clients during the first sessions. Usually they talk a lot about other people, especially one or two who are like “red rags ” in their eyes.

One of my client was talking about “unguided missiles around”. This is a quite good picture to describe a horrible situation in a business context in which he was working in.

When I listen closely to my clients they talk about..

…meetings, which they experience like a “battle field”. Do you know such situations?

…”harsh and demeaning words” used in meetings, conversations. Do you know such situations?

…people answering like a commander before they have fully listened. Do you know such situations?

…ignorance. Do you know such situations?

…more arrogant and demeaning behaviour.

I am sure you are able to continue the list by yourself…

All these situations of “missile behaviour” often combined with personal struggles can lead to an unbalanced mindset where innovative thinking, productive doing and happy feelings as well as our health going down the drain.

So what can be done?

3. Develop self awareness

Become a master at selfawareness  by developing reflective thinking for yourselves. Reflective thinkingnot only means to reflect on the behaviour of the other one, but it also means to become aware of and develop selfawareness for yourself.

2. Develop reflective thinking

We should start to reflect more on ourselves, the health of our mind and body, the same way we reflect on our company and business success. In ouur business contexts we are trained to think ” out of the box”. We are trained to solutions for problems. We are trained to be innovate and turn innovative thoughts into reality. We are supposed to be conscious about the ressources we use for business matters. We should be able to use this consciousness for personal selves.

1. Develop observing skills

We should be more analytical in an observing way for ourselves. What happened to us? Which signals does our body give us, when confronted with “missile behaviour”? Which thoughts are striking us?

Are you a good observer? Do you have noticed the numbers written down in an untypical way? Great.

I would like to ask you to imagine the following picture…

Imagine a magical and brilliant company with an innovative, creative think tank, full of energy in which all the diverse teams work together in a highly efficient and effective way and are sucessful while having fun, being in harmony and feeling happy. Does this sound good to you?

Can you imagine that we are this diverse business called “HB – Human Being” run by our brain, our body and our relationships within and out this business? We are a wonderful meltingpot of thoughts,emotions, feelings, behaviour, electrical, chemical actions and reactions and mechanical workforce.

All in a single human being. We should be more aware of this.

And now imagine the threat of a “hostile takeover”of our “HB-Business” with “missile behaviour”. In the real business world, as you know, it is more than usual that the business begins to hire auditors, lawyers, tax and other consultants, to all give useful advice and convey feelings of safety so that the business can continue running smoothly, being sucessful and can be protected from a hostile takeover.

In case of a “hostile takeover” through “unguided missiles” and “missile behaviour” we should focus on ourselves be more professional with ourselves and use this very pattern to avoid “hostile takeovers” by working with an Executive Coach for our own “diverse business” called ” HB-Human Being” in order to stay safe, healthy, focused and sucessful.

We should keep in mind that we can have many business cases and projects but only have one life. There is no need to be to busy for happiness.http://peopledevelopmentmagazine.com/busy-self-awareness/