12 Lies You Keep Telling Yourself And Must Stop Now

12 Lies You Keep Telling Yourself And Must Stop Nowo

Do you know your lies can become your truth? Yes, they can, if you repeat them long enough and believe them hard enough.

When you allow your dreams to die, your life becomes meaningless, unfulfilling and sad. You are robbed of your joy, your happiness, your gifts and your purpose for being here. Many people live and die and never fulfilled their purpose because they believe the lies others told them.

There are so many people with untapped potential and ingenious ideas who will never realize they do because they were lied to and have accepted those lies as the truth.

That’s what happens when you have been told over and over again that you couldn’t accomplish your goals and aspirations.

Once you believe those lies, they will become self-fulfilling prophesies. They then become your truth.

You accept them as the way things are going to be.
Have you ever stop to consider why you are the way you are or why you do the things you do? Many times the lie you were told as a child have taken root and your truth are all lies.

Most of us were lied to as children by adults who told us that we wouldn’t amount to anything. Then, you had no control over how you felt about yourself but as an adult you can change the way you see yourself.
Today is the day to correct all the lies you’ve unconsciously accepted as true and live in your truth. Begin the healing process; start living and thriving to be all you can be. It is all up to you now.
You have to disown all the false assumptions about who you are and what you can or cannot do. These are the lies planted in your head, and you have held on to and made your truth. You now have the power to undo all that you were told, and you need to do so now.
Below are just some of the lies you were told that you now need to think of as lies and to believe otherwise:-

1. They can do that, but you can’t
Think about it seriously, we all have been there and done it. We see successful people and many times said to ourselves they can but not us. Why not you? What separates them from you, but you believe that indeed you can’t. That is a lie, and you need to know it. You need to turn that lie around and say to yourself today – if they can do it ……so can I.

2. In order to do B, I must do A first
How many times we have had dreams of accomplishing something, and we kill those dreams because we’ve been told that in order to do it, we must accomplish something else first. That is another lie you need to dispel. You want to do B, find a way to do B without accomplishing A or work on both at the same time. Chart your path. That’s a lie you have been telling yourself for so long, and you must now stop believing.

3. I do not feel up to it
That is another lie your mind has been telling you for years. You do not allow your feelings to dictate what you can or cannot do. You are in control of how you feel, and if your temporary mood is telling you not to, you need to change that. You are more powerful than your emotions. You control how you feel and when you feel something. You have the power to get yourself into the mood to complete that task.

4. I am too old/broke/young to change
Your financial state or age should never be the reason not to go after your dreams. Never let your age or financial situation keep you from going after what you want. Look around you, there are people of all ages, financial status going out and doing great things. You need to quit believing those lies and go full force after what you want. It is never too late.

5. It is easier said than done
Indeed, it is easier said than done because if it were easy everybody would have done it. That is something you have to understand. Nothing in life worth having is going to come easy. You need to say to yourself that if I want it I must be prepared to work harder than everyone else. You must want it badly enough to do whatever it takes to get it.

6. I am unlucky
That is an excuse we all use for doing the crazy things we sometimes do. There is no such thing as being lucky. Luck is opportunity meeting preparation. You must be prepared to make your luck. You must work hard and be prepared for opportunities when they arise. Sitting back and waiting for things to happen won’t do. Forge your path in life.

7. Life is unfair
Why would you think such a thing? Nobody has been given a guide on life. How do you know what is or isn’t fair? It is life. You need to be able to see things as normal course of life and not that it is working against you. Who defines what is fair and what isn’t? Everybody has challenges, and that includes you. You are no different from anyone else. You need to get used to the fact that things will happen that you do not like, but that is how life is and work with it.

8. Someone else has done it already
Yes, someone else may have invented something or done something that you thought you would be the first to do. That is alright. Why not improve what has already been done? Find new ways to improve people’s lives with the things that are already done. There is no need to reinvent the wheel, but you can find other uses for the wheel or ways to make it better.

9. I am not smart enough
Some of the most creative, intelligent people were written off by others yet they believed in themselves and their ideas and went out and made things happen. You cannot afford to allow others opinions of you to determine what your life will be. All that matters is how you see yourself and what you want to achieve. No one has to believe in your dream but you. Prove them all wrong.
10. Someone told you, you couldn’t
People will always find reasons why you shouldn’t or can’t do something. Many times, unfortunately, that is the way they think about themselves. They use their self-imposed limitations to judge you. Remember your dreams are yours, and it’s no one’s job to see it through but you. You have to want it badly enough to do what it takes to see it through to fruition.

11. I do not deserve better
Unfortunately, too many of us have bought into the lies that we do not deserve happiness. We have adjusted ourselves to accept mediocrity. We do not believe we deserve love because we weren’t loved growing up or worst since our parents were poor that is all we will be. That is one of the biggest lies ever told. You must believe that you are deserving of the best life has to offer and then make the effort to achieve it. You must constantly tell yourself that you deserve everything good and splendid.

12. I am not good enough
If you believe you aren’t good enough then you will never be good enough. You have to remind yourself that the information that was fed to you before were lies. Now you know better you must accept the fact those were lies and that the truth is you are indeed good enough. You have to tell yourself that if anyone is good enough it’s you. You have to start seeing yourself differently. You must first accept that you are different.

We all have been lied to at some point or another in our lives, but as adults we now need to change our thought pattern and make sure that those lies do not become fulfilling prophesies.
You need to believe the opposite of all the lies you have been told. Keep reminding yourself that you can do all things if you put your mind to it and want it badly enough.

http://www.dumblittleman.com/2015/05/12-lies-keep-telling-must-stop-now.html

Shake off Your Jitters (Pt 2 of 2)

Last week I discussed what the No. 1 fear is for most people, public speaking.
In part 2 of our series, I am going to give you my 3 tips for conquering this fear so you can start rocking the stage.

Mark Twain, who made most of his income from speaking, not writing, said,
“There are only two types of speakers in the world. 1. The nervous and 2. Liars.”
Let me help you with that nervousness.

I do a lot of keynote presentations. My first company at 18 years old required me to speak publicly many times a week, and I have done it thousands of times since. Most of the businesses I have built compelled me to champion the cause of the business through large group presentations. I am often asked for tips on preparing, packaging and deliveringpresentations, so let me pass forward a few of the tips that have worked for me when it comes to overcoming jitters:

First off, you have to come to terms with this:

Who Cares? (Certainly not the audience).

Someone once told me that the reason why there is NO reason to be nervous is because people care far less than you think. Think about the last time you were in row 30 of an auditorium, in the corner of a boardroom or in the back of some dreary classroom trying desperately not to daydream or fall asleep. You think they are hanging and judging you on your every word, when in reality their greatest hope is that you are close to ending.

Remember this: They’re not judging you as much as you think, because they don’t care as much as you think. I think knowing this helps enormously (whew, feel better already?)

In the super unlikely event that some disaster does happen, something explodes or you trip and fall, at least you know you will have more attention from the audience than in the 30 seconds before. Now you can use that attention to do something good.

Certainly, whatever you say next will be remembered. If nothing else, your tragedy will give the audience something fun and funny to share. The laughter from that story will do more good for the world than most anything your presentation might have done anyway.

Meaning again, look, it’s not a big deal really. The only one making it so is you.
It’s all self-imposed fear conjuring.
Repeat that mantra in your head: no one really cares.

Number two:
Who Do You Think You Are, Anyway?

Here’s another tip someone shared with me about being nervous before speaking:
If you are nervous that means you are being an egotist—making yourself way too important. Instead, you should be making this about the audience. Stop thinking about yourself, your performance and how you will look, and think only about your audience.

Think about them, their problems, fears, hopes, dreams and ambitions.
You are there only to serve them.
The spotlight should be on them, not you.

When you take the spotlight off yourself and make what you are there for about them, not only does your nervousness go away, but you also empathize and connect with your audience better.

Finally number three, and I learned this from John Maxwell when I asked him how he prepares for his keynote presentations. Maxwell says an hour before his presentation, he stops looking at and studying his material and only thinks about his audience.

He envisions them sitting in the audience. He tries to see the stage from their vantage point, what they must be thinking, feeling, hoping for, wanting and not wanting. In other words, he tries to get into their head and heart instead of staying stuck in his head. Ultimately connecting with the audience happens only when you enter the conversation they are already having in their head and once you connect with the desires they already have in their heart.

http://darrenhardy.success.com/2015/04/shake-off-jitters-2/#article

12 Daily Habits: The Art of Creating a Brand-New You

12 Mar 2015

Vishnu

by

A few years ago, I wasn’t the person I wanted to be…

I was prioritizing the wrong things, focused on accomplishments and not growing as a person. I began my own path of personal development that would help me become the person I was capable of being.

And what have I received in the last couple of years?

More fulfilling work and closer relationships, but more than anything else, a better relationship with myself. I’m becoming internally the person I want to be so that I can create positive change in my life and achieve my dreams.

This has taken quite a bit of work.

I’ve taken on daily personal development habits that have helped me become an entirely new person.  These daily habits have been game-changers for me.

Not only have I experienced profound inner growth and peace, I’ve started seeing dramatic improvements in all areas of my life.

These habits will do the same for you.

Here are 12 daily habits that will help you become the person you want to be.

1. The Art of Silence

For much of our days, we focus on the external. When we’re not speaking to someone or working on something, we are stuck perpetually on our smart (dumb) phones, checking in with other people, browsing Facebook and loving our neighbor’s Instagram updates.

To focus on yourself, you have to put all this aside for at least a few minutes a day.

To create daily quiet time, commit to practicing silence for a few minutes. If you can’t keep quiet and refrain from doing anything for a few minutes, try other practices, like meditation or prayer.

You can also take a walk – even better, a walk in nature to help you disengage from the outside world. Whatever you do, don’t take your cell phone with you. You’ll live without your iPhone!

2. The Art of Exercise

Exercise can be a life-changing personal development habit.

I remember Scott Dinsmore writing about the powerful habit of being fit a couple of years back. He mentioned that staying fit was the habit of Richard Branson and so many other top performers in the world, from the President of the United States (Barack Obama) to the world’s top bloggers (Chris Guillebau and Leo Babauta). 

If exercise was having such an impact on all of them, there must be something to it. As Scott pointed out, “The people who do well have pointed out that the more they respect their body, the more it will do for them.”

The secret to daily exercise is to pick something you enjoy doing, something that you will create time for and that you can start in small increments.

It doesn’t have to be something like training for a marathon or becoming a yoga instructor. Do whatever you can, even if only for a few minutes a day. Walk, swim, jump rope, go for a jog – anything that brings physical movement to your life.

3. The Art Of Seeing The Future

Alright, you don’t have to become a psychic.

You can practice living in the future by assuming that what you want is already here.

Yes, visualization.

When you set goals or have dreams, you must intend to achieve them and actively work on them. However, it’s also helpful if you can see your future in your mind.

Not just see it, but feel as though it has already happened. If your goal is to be a world-famous chef, start picturing yourself as a world-famous chef. Visit fancy kitchens, hob-knob with local chefs and spend hours in the kitchen honing your skills. Imagine yourself on television, stir-frying in world-famous hotels and giving autographs during your cook-book signings.

It’s not at all extreme to sit down in a bookstore and sign some books to give to your fans. (Of course, first purchase the books and try to be discreet so security doesn’t kick you out.)

See it in your mind. Feel it. Act it out. Make your dream a present reality.

4. The Art Of Affirmations

Underneath your mind is your subconscious mind, which you can’t see, touch or talk to.

It stays there, silently making its own decisions, developing its own beliefs and living its own life in a tropical paradise known as the inner self.

Your subconscious friend has a mind of her own. While you may think you’re in charge, you’re really not. She’s in charge.

And how do you influence this inner subconscious person who resides within?

Affirmations.

No matter what anyone says and how silly it may seem, affirmations work.

When you repeat these inner self-help mantras, you are conditioning your subconscious mind. While your subconscious wants you to believe you’re a hopeless person without confidence and that you deserve a life of poverty, you can counter those inner thoughts with affirmations.

Here is an example of 35 affirmations you can use on the daily. One habit I’ve found effective is to write a couple of affirmations in places where you spend a good portion of your day. Doing this, you’ll receive continual reminders to repeat these affirmations.

5. The Art Of Blessings (Counting Them)

When you think about how good things are in your life, you can’t help but feel more positive, more inspired and more motivated.

But what if you think nothing is going well and you’re in complete despair?

Here’s the trick and it’s one you must try out in your life – counting your blessings.

I try to write 10 things I’m grateful for each day. Sometimes this list goes on toward the upward count of 30 to 40 things that I’m grateful for.

Incorporate a gratitude practice and see how your life changes. It just takes a couple minutes a day to consciously note everything that is going well for you and all the people who are being good to you.

And here’s another secret – the more you appreciate the good things that come your way, the more good things will come your way.

6. The Art Of Giving

Last year, on a daily basis, I tried to do something for someone that would improve his or her life.

It can be the smallest thing in the world that has the biggest impact – a compliment, a smile, leaving the door open or almost any little thing that brightens someone’s day.

If you’re in the service profession, take it one step further by going out of your way to help your customers a bit more. Take a little more interest in them. Show a little more compassion toward their problems or concerns.

By practicing the art of giving every day, you develop the habit of caring about others.

Other ways to give include volunteerism, service days, donations of money or time and more. Become a giving machine.

7. The Art Of Insight

You don’t need a therapist couch to learn more about yourself and gain additional insight into your life.

Sure, you can work with a life coach or talk with a friend to help you get mental and emotional clarity.

Or you can do it on your own. How?

Write.

And no, you don’t have to write for the masses in a blog.

Instead of publicly blogging, you can journal your thoughts, problems and life dilemmas. Ask yourself the questions you’re confused about and watch the answers magically appear in your writing.

You have the answers to your life.

8. The Art Of Growing Your Mind

Engage in a practice every day that grows your mind and your knowledge base.

Get inspired by reading, listening to audio-books, watching Ted talks or taking in other inspirational content.

By listening and watching motivational content, you can’t help but improve.

Don’t become a serial inspiration junkie, though. Don’t just soak in content and live your life the way you were living it previously.

What is the one thing you can take away from the book you read or the video you watched? Write it down and apply it to your life.

9. The Art Of Presence

It’s hard in today’s world to focus on the task at hand, but turn every situation into a game in which you’re focused only on the task in front of you.

It’s especially distracting to work online while checking Facebook and Instagram every two minutes.

One way I’ve found to stay focused is to have a piece of paper next to me. Every time I feel like I want to stop focusing on the task at hand, I write down a hash mark. I keep track of the number I’m creating. Being aware of how often I get distracted helps me stay focused on what’s in front of me.

Commit to focusing on one task at a time and especially on the task in front of you. You can’t do more when you multitask. You do more when you’re fully present with what you’re working on right now. 

10. The Art Of Priorities

You can do this every day or the night before for less than five minutes a day.

Just five minutes of planning can drastically alter your life and your day.

In the earlier part of the day, determine what your day will look like. Do a little planning.

Note all your “must-do” activities and your “should-do” tasks. Determine which are important and which can wait.

Plan and prioritize your day for a few minutes every day and watch your life and career transform.

11. The Art Of Dining

Whoever said there was an art to dining?

You just stuff down as much junk food as you can or food that makes you feel good without a second thought.

Hogwash.

The way to design the most productive and effective you is to be mindful of your food.

You can change your health, emotional well-being and mental well-being by changing your diet.

And the most efficient diet for your well-being is a plant-based diet that includes fruits and vegetables.
Also, reduce sweets, snacks and sugar. Cut down on fat, GMO food and processed food.

Consider eating less fried food and cutting down on high-calorie desserts. Less sugar-filled, high-calorie drinks and more water.

Take care of your body and it will take care of you.

12. The Art Of Down Time

Instead of planning every single minute of the day, schedule time off.

You don’t have to be busy and occupied every hour.

You need time to refocus, get re-energized, rest and relax. You need time for affirmations, visualization, relaxation and exercise.

Use your down time to complete the activities mentioned in this post.

Don’t wait until you have time to relax before you take time off. Downtime won’t just appear; you have to schedule it.

Develop healthy living and eating habits that put you in a state in which you’re ready to create a new life for yourself.

It’s the small consistent steps to improve your health and well-being that will help you achieve success.

Your greatest life begins with the small actions you take today.

http://www.finerminds.com/personal-growth/12-daily-habits-the-art-of-creating-a-brand-new-you/

Shake off Your Jitters (Pt 1 of 2)

A while back I was giving a two-hour training to a group of a few hundred sales professionals.

In the front row were a couple of women who kept smiling, giggling, elbowing each other and pointing at me.

I thought, “Man, I’m killing them up here. I must be in The Zone!”

I was so encouraged that I got even more passionate and animated in my presentation. Near the very end of my talk, I looked down and realized that my fly had been gaping open the entire time.

Near the very end of my talk, I looked down and realized that my fly had been gaping open the entire time.

What was worse is the entire audience noticed that I JUST noticed.

I quickly put on a face of comic surprise and everyone roared.

Then, as the laughter died down, I leaned against the podium, nodded knowingly, and said:

“Remember this, of all the sales strategies, tips and tactics we talked about today, none of them mean a thing unless you remember to close.”

And with that I zipped up my fly.

I got a standing ovation and for years after that presentation, people discussed whether or not I’d planned the whole incident.

When speaking in front of crowds or giving a presentation, sometimes your greatest fears can be your greatest moments of engagement, humility and memorability. Embrace it all.

Look, success in today’s world comes down to your ability to sell your ideas, expand your influence and enroll others into a worthy mission or cause.

That means you need to learn to present.

Today I will be giving you a few key ideas to help you conquer the hearts and minds of those you seek to influence through presentation.

By the way, EVERYBODY is a public presenter.

Maybe you’re presenting your ideas at an office meeting, interviewing for a new job, pitching your argument for why a new piece of office equipment is needed or trying to convince your friends which movie should win the Oscar. Whatever the situation, being able to speak effectively in public is essential to success.

Whatever the situation, being able to speak effectively in public is essential to success.

A recent survey conducted by Distinction discovered that, of the executives and entrepreneurs surveyed, more than 86 percent said being able to present effectively has a significant impact on their income and success.

But you are afraid to speak in front of a group.

It’s true, many see this as a Death-Defying act.
According to most studies, people’s No. 1 fear is public speaking.
No. 2 is death.

Doesn’t that sound insane?
People would rather die than speak in public.

That means if you go to a funeral, more people would rather be the one in the casket than have to give the eulogy!

First off, let’s put this into proper perspective:
No one has ever died giving a bad presentation.
Well, except for President William Henry Harrison.
Harrison developed pneumonia after giving the longest inaugural address in U. S. history. Which I guess is our first lesson on giving a presentation—keep it short or you might die… or at least kill the attention span of your audience.

So why do we think connect speaking in public to an act of suicide?

We come by this fear through our crazy ancestral brain wiring.
You have to remember that we have been walking erect for more than 4 million years.
Even if you call “modern man” 6,000 years old, we have some long-living, deep-seated survival brain wiring that is really over-inflated for our modern times.

We have learned that predators hunt in packs and their easiest prey are those who stand alone, without a weapon, on a flat area of land where there is no cover.

What does that sound like?
Yeah, standing on a stage, alone, in front of an audience, with all their eyes fixed on you.

Our ancestors, the ones who survived, that is, developed a fear response mechanism to these situations. However, these days we are rarely chased by lions or attacked by packs of hyenas, making our fear response programming out of sync with much of modern life.

You have to ask yourself, “Hey, what’s the worst that can happen?”
Certainly death is rarely a consequence, so anything short of that leaves nothing to be afraid of, really.

So my job as your mentor is to help you shake off the jitters when it comes to speaking in public.
You might find it helpful to know that some of the most successful and famous public speakers have the same ancient brain wiring issues we all have:

-Elvis Presley said, “I’ve never gotten over what they call stage fright. I go through it every show.”
-Bono, of U2, claims to get nervous the morning of every one of the thousands of shows he’s performed.
-Thomas Jefferson was so afraid of public speaking that he had someone else read the State of the Union Address. George Washington didn’t like speaking either.
-Winston Churchill, John F. Kennedy, Margaret Thatcher, Barbara Walters, Johnny Carson, and Barbra Streisand have all reported fears of public communication.
-I just read an interview with legendary crooner Tony Bennett in Esquire where he said, “Every great performer I have ever met has been frightened to go on.”
-Even Aristotle, Isaac Newton, Charles Darwin, Winston Churchill, Jack Welch, James Earl Jones and the former King of England, all had stutters and were nervous speakers at one time in their lives.

So hey, if you are a bit nervous, you are in good company, and there is a great chance you can still be stellar at it.

http://darrenhardy.success.com/2015/04/shake-off-jitters-1/#article

Rohn: 8 Traits of Healthy Relationships

Which of these will you work on today?

Nothing can bring more joy to life than beautifully fulfilling relationships. The depth of meaning, understanding and appreciation that these kinds of relationships bring is almost unfathomable. And, of course, as many people find out, nothing can bring so much pain as a broken relationship with someone dear to you.

Yes, relationships make the world go ’round. For better or for worse. But the exciting thing is that we can do much to increase our chances of having terrific relationships—relationships that are fulfilling and exciting, rich with meaning, joy and love. There are basics that govern most human relationships and these basics are what I want to cover below. So here is my list of the eight essentials that I believe make up the basics of healthy relationships.

1. Love. Now, this all depends on your definition of love. Most people think that love is a feeling, but I would strongly debate that point. Actually, the concept of “like” is really about feelings. When you say you like someone, you are talking about how you feel. But when you say that you love someone, you are not necessarily talking about how you feel about them. Love is much deeper than a feeling. Love is a commitment we make to people to always treat that person right and honorably. Yes, for those we become especially close to, we will have feelings of love, but I believe it is time for us to re-examine what we mean by love. We must expand our definition of what love means by including the commitment aspect of love. For healthy relationships, we must love everyone. We may not like them based on how we feel about them, but we should love them based on our definition of love above which in turn determines how we should act toward them; that is, treat them right and honorably. This is the basis of all healthy relationships.

2. Serving Heart. My good friend Zig Ziglar says frequently that “you can have everything you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want out of life.” The concept he is talking about is having a heart and life that is focused on serving other people. The Bible puts it this way: consider others’ interests as more important than your own. This is also fundamental to healthy relationships.

3. Honest Communication. In any good relationship you will find open and honest communication. Communication is so important because it is the vehicle that allows us to verbalize what is inside us and enables it to connect with another person. Isn’t communication amazing? One person is feeling one thing, and through communication, another person can find that out and feel it too—amazing. And this is a vital goal in good relationships—to communicate, to tell each other what we are thinking and what we are feeling. It enables us to make a connection. Sometimes we are the one speaking and other times we are listening. Either way, the central tenet is communication for the sake of building the relationship and making it stronger. And here’s what’s exciting: If we just communicate, we can get by. But if we communicate skillfully, we can work miracles!

4. Friendliness. Put simply, relationships just work better when we are friendly with others. Being friendly can cushion the bumpy ride we sometimes experience in our relationships. Cheerfulness goes a long way toward building lasting relationships. I mean, nobody wants to be around a grump, do they? The fact is that the friendlier you are the more you are going to have people who want to pursue longer-lasting, mutually beneficial relationships with you. So cheer up, put on a smile, have kind words to say to others, treat people with a great deal of friendliness and you will see your relationships improve.

5. Patience. People being people, we have an awful lot of time for practice in the area of patience. People are not perfect and will constantly fail us. And conversely we will fail other people. So while we try to have more patience for others, we need their patience as well. So often, I think relationships break down because people give up and lose patience. I am talking about all kinds of friendships, marriages, business relationships, etc. Recent research has shown that those marriages that go through major turmoil, and then make it through, are very strong after doing so. Patience wins out. Those who give up on relationships too early, or because the other person isn’t perfect, often forget that their next friend, their next spouse or business partner will not be perfect either! So we would do well to cultivate this skill and learn to have more patience.

6. Loyalty. Loyalty is a commitment to another person. Sadly, loyalty is often a missing element in many relationships today. We have forgotten what it means to be loyal. Our consumer mentality has affected this to some degree. People are no longer loyal to a product. And unfortunately, many companies are not loyal to their clients or patrons. Regrettably, this has spilled over into our relationships. It is one thing to switch brands of dishwashing detergent. It is another thing altogether to switch friends. Sometimes we just need to commit to being loyal and let the relationship move forward. We need a higher level of stick-to-it-iveness! This kind of loyalty will take our relationships to a much deeper level. What a powerful and secure feeling of knowing that you have a relationship with someone who is loyal to you and you to them—that neither of you is going anywhere even when things get tough. Wow, how powerful!

7. A Common Purpose. One of the basics of healthy relationships is to have a common purpose, and oftentimes this is a component that is initially overlooked, but for a long-term, long-lasting relationship it is vital. Think about how many friends you have met through the years while working on a common purpose. Maybe it was someone you met while participating in sports, while working on a political campaign, attending church, at your office, or anything that brought you together to work on a common purpose. You had that strong common bond of purpose that brought you together and held you together. Working together, building together, failing and succeeding together—all while pursuing a common purpose—is what relationships are made of. Find people with whom you have common purposes and sow the seeds of great relationships, and then reap the long-lasting benefits.

8. Fun. All good relationships have some element of fun. Now, that doesn’t necessarily mean loud, raucous fun, though that is appropriate for some relationships. But even in business relationships there should be some fun. It should be fun to do business with those who you are going to have a long-term business relationship with. Fun brings enjoyment to the relationship and that is important. I think that oftentimes this key element can be easily forgotten or neglected in our family and spousal relationships. The fun things we did initially in a new relationship after a while can be taken for granted or simply fall by the wayside and we stop creating the fun and joy. So remember to consciously craft fun situations and moments, for these are the glue that hold our memories together and make our lives sweet.

There are so many key ingredients to making and maintaining great, long-lasting relationships. Each of the eight components we discussed brings unique dynamics and rewards to your relationships. Let’s begin to focus on improving our relationships in these areas and see what miracles occur!

 http://success.com/article/8-traits-of-healthy-relationships

Self-Discipline - The Foundation For Success

No personal success, achievement, or goal, can be realized without self-discipline.  It is singularly the most important attribute needed to achieve any type of personal excellence, athletic excellence, virtuosity in the arts, or otherwise outstanding performance.

What is self-discipline?

It is the ability to control one's impulses, emotions, desires and behavior. It is being able to turn down immediate pleasure and instant gratification in favor of gaining the long-term satisfaction and fulfillment from achieving higher and more meaningful goals.

To possess it is to be able to make the decisions, take the actions, and execute your game plan regardless of the obstacles, discomfort, or difficulties, that may come your way.

Certainly, being disciplined does not mean living a limiting or a restrictive lifestyle. Nor, does not mean giving up everything you enjoy, or, to relinquish fun and relaxation. It does mean learning how to focus your mind and energies on your goals and persevere until they are accomplished. It also means cultivating a mindset whereby you are ruled by your deliberate choices rather than by your emotions, bad habits, or the sway of others. Self-discipline allows you to reach your goals in a reasonable time frame and to live a more orderly and satisfying life. 

How To Develop Self-Discipline

Start with baby steps. No process takes place overnight. Just as it takes time to build muscle, so does it take time to develop self-discipline. The more you train and build it, the stronger you become. In exercise, if you try to do too much at once, you could injure yourself and have a setback. Likewise, take it one step at a time in building self-discipline. So, begin by making the decision to go forward and learning what it takes to get there.

Learn what motivates you and what your bad triggers are. You can begin by learning about yourself! Sometimes it is very difficult to fight off urges and cravings, so know the areas where your resistance is low and how to avoid those situations.  If you know you can't resist cake, fries, or other temptations - stay away from them. Do not have them around to lure you in moments of weakness. If you also know that putting pressure on yourself does not work for you, then set yourself up in an environment that encourages the building of self-discipline rather than one that sabotages it. Remove the temptations and surround yourself with soothing and encouraging items such as motivating slogansand pictures of what you want to achieve. 

Learn also what energizes and motivates you. Your willpower can go up and down with your energy levels so play energetic music to perk you up, move around, laugh. Train yourself to enjoy what you are doing by being energized. This will make it easier to implement desirable and appropriate behaviors into your routine - which is really what self-discipline is all about. 

Make certain behaviors a routine. Once you have decided what's important to you and which goals to strive for, establish a daily routine that will help you achieve them. For example, if you want to eat healthily or lose weight; resolve to eat several servings of fruits and vegetables each day and exercise for at least half an hour. Make it part of your daily routine and part of your self-discipline building. Likewise, get rid of some of your bad, self-defeating habits, whatever they may be. They can put you in a negative frame of mind and hinder your self-discipline. A poor attitude can also be a bad habit. 

Practice self-denial. Learn to say no to some of your feelings, impulses and urges. Train yourself to do what you know to be right, even if you don't feel like doing it. Skip dessert some evenings. Limit your TV watching. Resist the urge to yell at someone who has irritated you. Stop and think before you act. Think about consequences. When you practice self-restraint it helps you develop the habit of keeping other things under control. 

Engage in sports or activities. Sports are an excellent way to enhance self- discipline. They train you to set goals, focus your mental and emotional energies, become physically fit, and to get along well with others.  Participating in sports provides a situation where you learn to work hard and strive to do your best, which in turn, teaches you to integrate the same the thought processes and disciplines into your everyday life.

Learning to play a musical instrument can be another great way to practice self-discipline. The focus, repetition, and application required in learning to play an instrument is invaluable. Achieving self-discipline in any one area of your life reprograms your mind to choose what is right, rather than what is easy.

Get inspiration from those you admire. Michael Jordan has always maintained that his greatness as a basketball player came as much from his willingness to work hard at his craft, as it did his talent. It was his desire through discipline and focus that made him one of the best basketball players ever. If it worked for him, it could certainly work for the rest of us. 

Visualize the rewards. There is nothing more gratifying than accomplishing your goals. Practice the technique that high achievers and top athletes do. Project yourself in the future. Visualize your desired outcome. Feel how rewarding it is and the countless benefits you will enjoy. Remind yourself what it takes to get there.                                

The Benefits  It helps build self-confidence.  You accomplish more, and are therefore more productive. You are able to maintain a higher tolerance for frustration, obstacles and negative emotions. Allows you to obtain better health, better finances and a good work ethic. You are able to reach your most difficult goals more efficiently.  The more disciplined you become, the easier life gets.

If we are to be masters of our own destiny, we must develop self-discipline and self-control. By focusing on long-term benefits instead of short-term discomfort, we can encourage ourselves to develop of self-discipline. Ultimately our health and happiness depend on it. 

http://www.essentiallifeskills.net/self-discipline.html